Are We Failing at Adulting?

When my husband turned 30 this month, we couldn’t help but reflect on where we are at in life and whether we have achieved all that we wanted to. 

When I was a child, I remember creating an outline for my life. By 20 I’d meet my future husband. By 24 I’d be married and have a house. By 26 I’d have kids. By 30 I’d be super successful in my career. And on, and on, and on.

Then, college came and went. I still hadn’t found someone to spend my life with, and I was working at a job that made me miserable. I lived with my mom and sister–which I was grateful for–but the highlight of my day being Judge Judy at 7PM wasn’t what I’d envisioned.

At that point, I began to realize that my imagined timeline was never going to happen, and it worried me. Suddenly, I felt totally and completely stuck–like I’d failed at being an adult.

It was difficult letting go of this vision of where I’d be in life and when, but as I saw more and more people my age experiencing the same thing? I realized that the life timeline we create for ourselves is doomed to fail. Not just because we have no control over our paths, but because–even if we did–the consequences would be disastrous. 

The timing in our lives is perfectly imperfect. Unless we accept this fact and let go of our expectations, we will feel unsettled and like we’re missing out.

While both my husband and I are grateful for all of the life goals we have been achieving together, for a while, we both failed to achieve the old-fashioned ideas of what it meant to be a successful adult–and that’s ok. We both had a ton of growing to do before we were ready for each other. We both still have growing to do and goals we’d like to achieve, but I wouldn’t change our timeline for anything.

My hope is that you can also accept exactly where you are so that you can experience happiness and get the most out of this season in your life.

One response to “Are We Failing at Adulting?”

  1. kaitlinarmorris Avatar

    This is so important for everyone to realize and accept! Thanks for the much needed reminder 💗


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